Some years ago, I received a copy of Marie Kondo’s wonderful, The Life -Changing Magic of Tidying. This was perhaps a comment on my rather laissez-faire approach to housework and intended as a prompt to improve my habits. If it was, it worked. I dutifully set about reading and taking notes. What initially seemed a sweet book on tidiness soon transformed into a very wise reflection on our relationship with possessions.
To truly cherish the things that are important to you, you must first discard those that have outlived their purpose.
Marie Kondo The Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up
The essence of her magic is this: to let go of anything that no longer brings you joy and value that which does. Simple? In theory. In practice, it was going to take a bit of work.
First steps
My book, I discovered, is already a decade old and my initial tidying efforts seriously lapsed. Prompted by my son’s lovely girlfriend to take a look at Kondo’s Netflix series, I was inspired to try again.
Not everything had been lost: my wardrobe is still arranged by colour and my clothing drawers essentially orderly – though I think a little refolding may be required. The genius of Kondo’s folding method is that items are stored vertically rather than laid on top of each other. She’s even provided a handy video to show you how.
Letting go
With my renewed determination to ‘Marie Kondo’ my house, I was first obliged to do the most difficult part: letting go of all the things that I no longer needed. This goes against the grain for most of us, since what we possess acquires value purely because it is ours. We are not designed for abundance. We are programmed for adversity. Except, in prosperous countries at least, this no longer applies. Whatever we want is only a click away.
Kondo helps us overcome this reluctance with a rather brilliant formula. Rather than asking do we want/need something, she advises that we ask if it sparks joy. There is no room for fudging. If the answer is no, we should dispose of it thoughtfully – to a charity shop or friend or if beyond hope to the recycling or dump. Whatever its fate, we should also remember to thank the item for its service. We let it go with love and hope that the joy it once brought us will pass to another.
The world will thank you
Kondo’s system is especially helpful for those wanting to make little adjustments to the impact they have on the planet. At the heart of her method is a sincere wish that we do not always crave more but value what we have. Here are a few of the tips I remember and am frantically trying to implement!
- Go around the house and collect all the things that go together and store in the same place.
- Check what you have before you purchase anything new.
- Take time to investigate all the drawers and cupboards in your home. You might be surprised and delighted by what turns up! Kondo would advocate emptying your whole house to do this properly, but I’m just focusing on one drawer at a time.
- If the object isn’t of any use to you, find someone who might enjoy it.
Gratitude
Being thankful for our possessions is key to the Kondo method and what, I think, sets it apart from all those house organisation guides. In her book, she talks about emptying her handbag completely each day and thanking each and every item that comes out of it. When I first read it, I laughed. Really? She has clearly not encountered the horrors of mine. But on reflection, I realised that what she was doing was placing gratitude at the heart of her life. When she looks at her bus pass, she thinks of how it has helped her traverse the city; when she takes out her coin purse, how it has enabled her to purchase little essentials.
I am very far from being that wise, but I am trying to review my attitude to things as existing purely for my own convenience to seeing them for what they are: objects that significantly improve my life. Cicero viewed gratitude as the greatest of all virtues and this seems a good place to start developing it.
Zen and the art of tidying
In Japanese Buddhism, all things are considered sentient – including plants and inanimate objects. Thus, all objects are accorded the respect and value we, in the West, would/should accord living things.
If we can acknowledge that everything – animate and inanimate – is interconnected and interdependent, we can come closer to understanding this view.
And if we take that to showing respect for all the material elements in our lives, we will gain a much healthier relationship with our possessions.
Tidy house, tidy mind
Kondo’s first book claims that adopting her method will be ‘life-changing’. This is a bold claim and, as one who is only working towards achieving tidiness, I cannot say that my life has been transformed … yet. What I can say is that it has made my life significantly easier in the areas where I have managed to adopt her ideas. It has given me the gift of more time, since I spend less searching for stuff. It has given me a greater appreciation for those things that I own and equally of those I have given away. It has proven to be a perfect opportunity for mindfulness. Sorting out my ribbon box below was the ideal antidote to a stressful week.
The result not only let me see exactly what I had, but I rather enjoyed the look of it too – my own miniature haberdashery.
My inroads into a tidy home have only just begun, but it is something that I plan to pursue further. Whenever I complete a sorting project, I get immense satisfaction and my relationship to the objects subtly changes too. If I have kept them, I recognise the joy they have sparked within me; if not, I am grateful that they once did.
For some, Kondo’s methods will literally transform lives in often unexpected ways; for me, I’m just grateful that I can find things.