Tag: Outdoors

Morning Meditations

This last weekend, my husband was away at a trade show, so my normal routine of yoga and meditation in the quiet of my bedroom was disrupted. I had to get up early and let Hermione have her run around the garden. It was a beautiful day, so I decided to try it alfresco. Despite being a chilly 10 degrees Celsius, the experience was enhanced by the location. Weather permitting, I’ve decided to continue this way as far into winter as I dare!

It’s taken me a very long time to reach the point where I would not consider starting the day without these physical and mental exercises, but their benefits have been immeasurable. The good news is that one can start small and work up. I vividly remember the agonies of trying to concentrate through a five minute guided meditation every evening. Now my half hour, unguided one, goes in a flash. The key, it seems, is in regular practice (even if that is only ten minutes a day).

The sunniest spot in the garden early morning
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Finding what is right for you

I have lost count of the number of people I have spoken to who find meditation either impossible or something that they cannot seem to find time for. Perhaps part of the reason for this is that it is, as a product, hugely mis-sold. Meditation does not eliminate stress from your life (but it does help you deal with it); nor does it turn you into a calm, perfect human (though it might help smooth your edges) and most importantly, it does not require you to jettison all thoughts to reach a state of Zenlike bliss. Meditation, like prayer, is all about directing thought rather than obliterating it.

When random thoughts arise, we greet them and let them go, bringing our attention back to our point of focus. This may be our breath, a candle or a prayer. It requires discipline and endless repetition. The Dalai Lama continues to meditate for hours every day. Even he would not suggest that he had no need of further practice. So if you are looking for a quick fix, this isn’t for you. However, if you are looking for a method that has been proven to improve your mental and physical well-being, here are some approaches you might try.

Thoughts, like clouds, drift across our consciousness
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Ways in

If you look on-line, you will find countless and many very good sources on meditation. I have tried a number of them and have a rather eclectic mix that I call my own. The one that I think of as being the best way to begin though is the listening meditation, as it helps reinforce the idea of focus and requires no more from you than simply to sit quietly.

This is one that I love to do in the garden. Sit on the ground cross legged, or on a chair with your feet on the ground and back straight. (If you lie in a deck chair, you are liable to fall asleep!) Start to listen to all the sounds around you. As your meditation deepens, you will hear ever quieter sounds that you have probably never noticed before. You don’t have to close your eyes, but do if that makes it easier. Set a timer for at least ten minutes. Take a moment to return to the world and say a thank you for what you have heard.

Alternatively, you can keep the same posture and contemplate a specific aspect or even object – like a flower. As your focus deepens, you will uncover richer layers of observance. Again, do this for as long as you can and try to observe mindfully throughout the day.

Breathing meditations are probably the most common form. I use the Wim Hof method, because the breathing structure and breath-holds don’t give you much option to let your mind wander.

You may want to do this one lying down, as it can leave you a little light headed.

If you want to meditate throughout the day, taking a few moments to concentrate on the breath – filling your lungs fully and then feeling the air exit passing gently over your mouth – is a great way to ground yourself.

Devising your own regime

Perhaps I was a magpie in a past life, but I have a terrible habit of acquiring things and forgetting to let them go. My meditation practice is no exception. As a result, all the elements that I have found useful over the past ten years have now found a home in my current routine. I don’t recommend that you necessarily do the same, but I do think that it is helpful to take a flexible approach. One form of meditation may fit perfectly, another may not – or not at the moment. No-one is watching and certainly no-one is judging your performance. Do what works for you.

So what is my daily practice? It begins with a little yoga. The stretching and focus on my body seems to help me get into the right zone for meditation. What follows is a mix of Wim breathing, imaging and loving kindness prayer. The loving kindness meditation is a classic one and helps us find compassion in our attitudes to even those who are our enemies or simply irritate us to death.

The version I use, based on a haunting musical interpretation, goes like this:

May I be filled with loving kindness, may I be well

May I be filled with loving kindness, may I be well.

May I be peaceful and at ease, may I be whole.

And here’s the musical version if, like me, you enjoy singing.

This is performed by my very talented friend Elizabeth Harris with the equally talented Anna Hamilton

I begin my meditation lying down and with the breathing Wim advocates, then during the breath-hold, I do the loving kindness prayer. With each cycle of breathing, I add another loving kindness object. Starting with myself, I move outwards from family to friends to those I do not care for too much. Some like to think of an area they live in and move to the world. I do that sometimes too.

Towards the end, I focus on healing kindness and imagine my body repairing itself. I have exquisite gold tipped butterflies that inhabit my brain and spinal chord and keep it free from lesions. (Don’t laugh, my latest MRI shows it is working!)

During the final stage, I simply reorient myself in the world. (You can feel a bit spacey at this point). I observe all the beauty around me and give thanks for the privilege of inhabiting such a magnificent creation. And now I am ready for the day.

Nothing is perfect

If this is all sounding a little too idyllic, I should perhaps mention that I have a little helper when it comes to my morning rituals! Hermione would never wish to be left out of anything, so yoga is performed with care so as not to squash the dog under my belly and meditation is conducted between throws of her Kong.

Does this bother me? Not particularly. Life is never going to accommodate you perfectly and accepting interruptions, noise and distractions and working through them is very much part of the discipline of these practices. If we are waiting for the ideal situation, we would never start at all. So, let us begin.

Only trying to help! Hermione with her favourite Kong toy
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Life is what happens – Part 2

As we enter our second full lock-down, it is more important than ever to see what benefits we can take from the first. The arrival of the vaccine is a beacon of hope, but of course, vaccines must be made, those delivering it trained and those receiving it administered. It will certainly be weeks, if not months, until any kind of normality returns. We could, as so many folks are doing, complain about the delay, or we could make the most of this hiatus from normal life. Since this blog is entitled, ‘When life gives you lemons,’ you know which approach I’ll be taking.

Living Simply

Since the first lock-down, my husband and I have been managing on rather less than half pay. We imagined that our carefully reserved savings would be wiped out; that our standard of living would plummet. Yet, ironically, we haven’t touched our emergency fund and our standard of living has never been better. Of course, we haven’t been on holiday or out to restaurants. We haven’t bought much in the way of clothes or had haircuts (though I could certainly do with one!) Living simply at home has meant that what we actually need is very little. Realising this has been liberating.

Simple and delicious! Homemade summer squash and vegetable soup and bread. Thanks to YouTube, I learned how to freeze my glut of squashes. Image: Jeff Costello-McFeat

Of course, none of this would have been possible without the generosity of the government furlough scheme, which ensured my husband kept his job and worked as much or as little as the pandemic allowed. Many of his colleagues in the US lost their jobs and I can all too well imagine how distressing that situation would be. So though Boris bashing may be a national pastime at the moment, having peered over the brink of an economic abyss, I am eternally grateful that I live in a country where, no matter what happens, your basic needs will be met.

God bless the NHS

Equally, I cannot say how much I treasure a health service that is free at the point of delivery. Trying to stay well during a pandemic is stressful enough; trying to work out how to pay for medical care should you require a prolonged hospital stay falls into the realm of nightmare. We are so used to this luxury that we forget that for almost all the rest of the world, it is an impossible dream.

I loved that we all stood out and applauded those front-line workers who care for us, but we need to show that we fully respect them by doing everything in our power to stay well and, equally vitally, to keep everyone else well too.

Working from home

As someone who has worked from home for the past eighteen years, I am well aware of its benefits. But for those used to the crazy hours and even crazier commutes of modern life, it has been a revelation. People who once had to rise at 6.30 to have any hope of getting to work before 9.00, can now enjoy rising at a civilised hour and have an extra two to four hours for themselves. People who barely got to see their children before bedtime, were able to join them for lunch. Jobs which seemed vital to perform in an office environment; meetings scheduled hundreds or even thousand of miles away, suddenly proved to be quite capable of being conducted successfully from home. For many, the realisation that a work/life balance is possible, will, I hope be carried forward into new working practices. Of course, most people will enjoy going to the office and having that social interaction, but it doesn’t need to be everyday. I, for one, will miss my husband terribly when he goes back to work. I’m just hoping that his usual twelve hour days will be reduced and that some of them will be worked at home.

Getting outside

The change that has been most obvious during the various lock-downs has been the number of people getting out to exercise and socialise. Almost all my friends now walk regularly and I suspect this is true for everyone. Where in the past, we might go for a walk in a local beauty spot and meet the odd other person, now we have to find somewhere less crowded. Parking at our favourite haunt at Birling Gap is virtually impossible. And although I sometimes grumble about all the outsiders using ‘our’ favourite spaces, I am actually delighted that families are making the effort to introduce their children to the wonders of the natural world. And as the restrictions are relaxed, I hope that at least some will continue look to the outdoors for entertainment before their Xboxes or iPads.

The garden in winter Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Despite the fairly atrocious weather recently, I still spend time in the garden every day and I join my husband for at least one of Hermione’s walks. Yesterday evening it was dark with freezing, drizzly rain, yet being outside felt wonderful and returning to a warm home, better still.

Giving the planet a rest

The pandemic has certainly not been good for humanity, but it has been very good for the natural world. Skies that were a fretwork of contrails are now only blotted by cloud. Roads, once congested and hazardous to cross, are now blessedly quiet. And as our spending and consumption decreases, so does the impact we have on the planet. Of course, I’m not suggesting we go back to living in a yurt, but this period has shown that we do not have to destroy our natural home to live well.

Because despite the challenges, difficulties and even grief this pandemic has brought us, it has focused our attention on what really matters. It seems, the best things in life are free. These things: friendship, family, health and Nature all nourish us in ways that material things only gratify briefly. If we can remember this and carry forward what we have learned, 2021 should be a very good year indeed, no matter how long it takes to resolve the current health crisis.

I’d like to end with a beautiful poem my friend sent me. It may be a little optimistic, but one can dream…

And the people stayed home

And read books, and listened, and rested, and exercised, and made art, and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently.

And the people healed. And, in the absence of people living in ignorant, dangerous, mindless and heartless ways, the earth began to heal.

And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again, they grieved their losses, and made new choices, and dreamed new images, and created new ways to live and heal the earth fully, as they had been healed.

Kitty O’Meara