When Life Gives You Lemons – Page 17 – Making my best life with MS

Meditations on a Carrot

A few weeks ago, I was happily munching on my carrot sticks, when I started to wonder how they got there. What was their journey from seed to my plate? This is not something that I normally do when eating, but I had been prompted by two rather different sources: one an article in the Waitrose magazine and the other, an excellent meditation book.

This unlikely duo had one thing in common: each wanted us to have a healthier and more grateful approach to our food. The Waitrose article was focusing on the effect of food waste and climate change and gave the rather chilling comment that, ‘If we stopped wasting food in UK homes for a single day, the environmental impact would be equivalent to 14,000 cars being removed from the road for an entire year.’ With approximately ‘a third of all food grown globally currently wasted,’ (Colin Butfield), we are looking at a staggering misuse of energy and resources.

The second prompt came from Gelong Thubten’s excellent A Monk’s Guide to Happiness, where he encouraged the reader to take some time to think about what they eat. Essentially, it was the basis for a gratitude meditation: gratitude not only for the food itself but for all those involved in its production.

Which is when I realised that if we combine the two, the outcome would be optimal. We would have a proper appreciation for what ends up on our table and as a consequence would be unlikely to waste it. A true win-win.

**A carrot rainbow** Image: Stephen Ausmus

The life cycle of a carrot

I’ve learned a lot about carrots while researching this post and I’d like to share with you some of what I have learned. Firstly, carrots are biennial, meaning that their whole life cycle takes two years to complete. Once their seeds are planted, they take between 80 and 120 days to grow into the root vegetable that we love and this marks the end of the first cycle. If we leave them in the ground, however, they will grow beautiful umbels. Their flowers change sex during their development, so that the pollen is released before the stigma is ready for fertilization. Once the seeds are formed, they drop to the ground – ready to make new carrots. Miraculous!

**The beautiful carrot flower** Image: Christian Fischer

Growing carrots

I confess to having shied away from growing carrots as they are notoriously awkward – requiring exactly the right soil and being prone to certain pests. Thankfully, the professionals have not been put off. But growing carrots, like all farming involves a great deal of effort. The soil must be prepared correctly as stones and obstacles will cause the carrots to split into unattractive shapes. Up to 30% of crops are often lost this way.

The soil must also be nourished with fertilizers and seedlings thinned to the correct distance to ensure optimal growth. Organic carrots will need even more intensive care, as they cannot rely on the artificial support of commercial fertilizers and pesticides.

And all the time they are growing, the soil will need to be kept clear of weeds to stop the plants from being choked or starved of nutrients and light. Anyone with their own little vegetable patch knows how much work this all is.

If all goes well, you will have a plentiful harvest. Picking by hand, as was done until fairly recently in the West and still in poorer parts of the world, is back-breaking labour.

**Harvesting carrots the old fashioned way** Image: Los Angeles Times

Farm to table

Of course, that only gets the crop out of the ground. It still needs to be washed, sorted, packaged and distributed to a store near you. This sweet little video shows you the whole story and if, like me, you love these kinds of things, you will forgive the child-centred approach.

For all you Blue Peter fans out there. You know who you are!

Mindful eating

I hope that I haven’t exhausted your patience with all this information about the journey of a carrot from seed to plate. But in a way, that is the point. When we are fully aware of all the effort put into our food, we will, I hope appreciate it. Mindful eating is all about savouring every mouthful and acknowledging and being thankful to the food itself and all those who have brought it to us.

While eating mindfully, we do not look at our phone, read or work. We honour the moment. Ideally, we will listen to our bodies and eat only what and when it is required and if possible, in the company of those we love. And if we are eating mindfully, we will also avoid foods that are bad for us. Both our physical and mental health will thank us for that. For a gentle introduction to mindful eating, you may like to read this article: https://www.mindful.org/6-ways-practice-mindful-eating/

Thanksgiving

This Thursday in the US, it is Thanksgiving. The festival was established as an act of gratitude for the native American Indians who, through teaching the early settlers about local food sources, saved them from starvation. It didn’t work out so well for the native Americans, but their kindness was exemplary.

We don’t celebrate Thanksgiving in the UK, but I would hope that we can establish every meal as an opportunity for the giving of thanks. This whole post has focused on the humble carrot – a small component of any meal – but if we can briefly recall that each and every item on our plate has had a similar investment, then perhaps we can express our gratitude by wasting not a single bit.

**A warming bowl of carrot and lentil soup** **to be savoured**
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

I Believe in Miracles

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
Albert Einstein

A dear friend gave me a book of daily, inspirational quotes and this was one of them. Most of the quotes I’ve read have been impressive and thought provoking, but this one kept nudging me for attention like a new puppy. Einstein gives only two options for living: to view the world as miraculous or completely miracle free. The last option seems just too depressing, but can we learn to see miracles all around us? At the risk of sounding naive, I think that we can.

**A perfect autumn leaf** Image: Tim Hufner on Unsplash

Everyday miracles

Our first obstacle to overcome is the popular view that miracles are exceptional. The Cambridge Dictionary defines a miracle as: ‘an unusual and mysterious event that is thought to have been caused by a god because it does not follow the usual laws of nature’. This certainly applies to the miracles in, say, the Bible, but what if miracles were much more everyday affairs (though no less magical).

When I looked for images of miracles online – almost all were of nature. For here, wonders occur every single day. With my dog Hermione wanting to be outside all the time, I am getting more than the average exposure to the beauty of the natural world. And without question it is worth the numb toes and chilly fingers that accompany immersion in the elements at this time of year.

**Sunset** Image: Dawid Zawila on Unsplash

Some of the clouds this morning had the frayed, liquid edges that you get when dropping ink onto wet, watercolour paper. How does this occur on the great canvas of the sky? I have no idea.

The leaves on the tree opposite my back garden have flamed into vibrant reds and orange and are only now starting to drop. The scientific explanation for this is, ‘a compound called abscisic acid triggers a seal to develop at the base of the leaves, before they fall off. This reduces water reaching the leaf and traps the chemicals remaining in the leaves. They gradually break down, changing the colour of each leaf before it drops to the ground.’ (www.kew.org) Good to know. But does it make it any less marvellous? I think not.

Einstein, after all, was the foremost scientist of the 2oth century and he did not see anything as less miraculous because it followed the laws of science. If anything, advanced science is itself a mystery that keeps eluding our comprehension and categorisation. Einstein himself tried, and failed, to construct a theory of everything. The closer we get to an answer, the further it spins away.

**How do you quantify a human touch?** Image: Liane Metzler

We live in a material world and one which we suppose we can control. The cold outside is rebuffed by central heating within; clean water is piped through taps; food is made bountiful by modern farming techniques. Like gods, we command and dominate nature, bending her to our will.

But our cleverness, like that of Daedelus, may not always lead to the desired outcome. If we are willing to relinquish this need always to explain and regulate, we open ourselves to the wonders that elude measurement.

I believe in miracles.

The morning sun scaling the walls of the horizon is a miracle.

The moon standing sentinel in the black of night is a miracle.

Miracles are everywhere. We do not have to wait long or look far to witness one.

Discovering that Spark of Joy

Some years ago, I received a copy of Marie Kondo’s wonderful, The Life -Changing Magic of Tidying. This was perhaps a comment on my rather laissez-faire approach to housework and intended as a prompt to improve my habits. If it was, it worked. I dutifully set about reading and taking notes. What initially seemed a sweet book on tidiness soon transformed into a very wise reflection on our relationship with possessions.

To truly cherish the things that are important to you, you must first discard those that have outlived their purpose.
Marie Kondo The Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up

The essence of her magic is this: to let go of anything that no longer brings you joy and value that which does. Simple? In theory. In practice, it was going to take a bit of work.

First steps

My book, I discovered, is already a decade old and my initial tidying efforts seriously lapsed. Prompted by my son’s lovely girlfriend to take a look at Kondo’s Netflix series, I was inspired to try again.

Not everything had been lost: my wardrobe is still arranged by colour and my clothing drawers essentially orderly – though I think a little refolding may be required. The genius of Kondo’s folding method is that items are stored vertically rather than laid on top of each other. She’s even provided a handy video to show you how.

Letting go

With my renewed determination to ‘Marie Kondo’ my house, I was first obliged to do the most difficult part: letting go of all the things that I no longer needed. This goes against the grain for most of us, since what we possess acquires value purely because it is ours. We are not designed for abundance. We are programmed for adversity. Except, in prosperous countries at least, this no longer applies. Whatever we want is only a click away.

Kondo helps us overcome this reluctance with a rather brilliant formula. Rather than asking do we want/need something, she advises that we ask if it sparks joy. There is no room for fudging. If the answer is no, we should dispose of it thoughtfully – to a charity shop or friend or if beyond hope to the recycling or dump. Whatever its fate, we should also remember to thank the item for its service. We let it go with love and hope that the joy it once brought us will pass to another.

The world will thank you

Kondo’s system is especially helpful for those wanting to make little adjustments to the impact they have on the planet. At the heart of her method is a sincere wish that we do not always crave more but value what we have. Here are a few of the tips I remember and am frantically trying to implement!

Go around the house and collect all the things that go together and store in the same place.
Check what you have before you purchase anything new.
Take time to investigate all the drawers and cupboards in your home. You might be surprised and delighted by what turns up! Kondo would advocate emptying your whole house to do this properly, but I’m just focusing on one drawer at a time.
If the object isn’t of any use to you, find someone who might enjoy it.

Gratitude

Being thankful for our possessions is key to the Kondo method and what, I think, sets it apart from all those house organisation guides. In her book, she talks about emptying her handbag completely each day and thanking each and every item that comes out of it. When I first read it, I laughed. Really? She has clearly not encountered the horrors of mine. But on reflection, I realised that what she was doing was placing gratitude at the heart of her life. When she looks at her bus pass, she thinks of how it has helped her traverse the city; when she takes out her coin purse, how it has enabled her to purchase little essentials.

**This is clearly not my handbag**! Image: Leisara on Unsplash

I am very far from being that wise, but I am trying to review my attitude to things as existing purely for my own convenience to seeing them for what they are: objects that significantly improve my life. Cicero viewed gratitude as the greatest of all virtues and this seems a good place to start developing it.

Zen and the art of tidying

In Japanese Buddhism, all things are considered sentient – including plants and inanimate objects. Thus, all objects are accorded the respect and value we, in the West, would/should accord living things.

If we can acknowledge that everything – animate and inanimate – is interconnected and interdependent, we can come closer to understanding this view.

And if we take that to showing respect for all the material elements in our lives, we will gain a much healthier relationship with our possessions.

Tidy house, tidy mind

Kondo’s first book claims that adopting her method will be ‘life-changing’. This is a bold claim and, as one who is only working towards achieving tidiness, I cannot say that my life has been transformed … yet. What I can say is that it has made my life significantly easier in the areas where I have managed to adopt her ideas. It has given me the gift of more time, since I spend less searching for stuff. It has given me a greater appreciation for those things that I own and equally of those I have given away. It has proven to be a perfect opportunity for mindfulness. Sorting out my ribbon box below was the ideal antidote to a stressful week.

**One has to start somewhere** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

The result not only let me see exactly what I had, but I rather enjoyed the look of it too – my own miniature haberdashery.

My inroads into a tidy home have only just begun, but it is something that I plan to pursue further. Whenever I complete a sorting project, I get immense satisfaction and my relationship to the objects subtly changes too. If I have kept them, I recognise the joy they have sparked within me; if not, I am grateful that they once did.

For some, Kondo’s methods will literally transform lives in often unexpected ways; for me, I’m just grateful that I can find things.

Giving Hope a Helping Hand

Looking at the news and hearing about the numerous difficulties and challenges of others, one might be forgiven for slipping into a sense of despair. The climate crisis alone is sure to give one pause. And no matter what deals are written this week at COP26, they are as insignificant as warm air upon the wind unless they are acted upon.

All of this got me to thinking about hope. It was the middle of the night and I was lying awake fretting over the very troubling news of a good friend. What is hope, after all? Is it, as the ancient Greeks claimed, but a cruel trick?

Pandora’s box

According to the myth, Prometheus angered the gods by giving the humans he created fire. As a consequence, he was doomed to daily, insufferable torture, but his brother Epimetheus was allowed to remain living among their creations on Earth. Having the faculty of foresight, Prometheus begged his brother not to accept any gifts from the gods, as he feared their vindictiveness would not end with his own punishment.

When Epimetheus was presented with the exceptionally lovely Pandora to be his wife and an exquisite box as a wedding gift from Zeus; however, he was unable to refuse. We all know the rest. Pandora, overcome with curiosity, opens the box, which releases the evils of the world. At the bottom lies hope. This is often interpreted as an act of kindness, but the more likely explanation is rather more bleak. The Greek gods were not famous for their altruism, after all. Hope is there, not to give succour to the humans, but rather to perpetuate their misery by giving them the strength to continue amidst all difficulty.

So, in the depth of night, I wondered if this was true. Was hope only a way of making us endure with false optimism or was it something else? Dawn was a long way off and I had plenty time to contemplate this.

**Holding hope in our hands** Image Ronak Valobobhai on Unsplash

Here’s hoping

My first thought was how hope was not hope but merely wishful thinking when we use it to desire a good outcome without having done much to secure it. I’m certain that I’m not the only person to prepare insufficiently for an exam or event and still keep my fingers crossed that the result will be good. Occasionally, we are lucky and it is; however, more often than not, it isn’t.

Many of us will be hoping for a good outcome of the COP26 summit, but unless we are willing to give that hope assistance in the form of life adjustments, our dreams are unlikely to be fulfilled. Such hope is, in fact, dangerous. The attitude that technology will save us; science will save us; politicians will save us, absolves us of responsibility and we need do nothing but wait. I would not wish to gamble on those odds.

**If I wish hard enough it will come true, right?** Image: Dayne Topkin on Unsplash

Good intentions

The road to Hell, they say, is paved with good intentions. I had always interpreted this to mean that without action, our good intentions are worthless. But it can equally mean that good intentions do not ensure positive outcomes. Those scientists who developed pesticides and herbicides to increase crop yields no doubt felt they were benefitting farmers and us by ensuring a bountiful and affordable food supply. The devastation that it has brought to the entire insect world would not have occurred to them. For a thorough examination of this phenomenon known as ‘the law of unintended consequences’, you may like to read the article here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/word-less/201904/the-road-hell-is-paved-good-intentions

Yet, without intentionality and the belief that we can improve situations, we are rendered powerless. So what exactly should we do? I confess that I’m not certain. For now, I’m going with a sort of two-pronged approach: to spend time in contemplation seeking a compassionate mindset and in making small steps in what I hope to be the correct direction. A gentle, methodical approach may not be exciting, but it does allow for flexibility and adjustments.

The urgency surrounding climate change may seem to warrant a rapid response, but it also means that we must get it right. If we take it upon ourselves to be as well-informed as we possibly can and to act without self-interest, I do believe that some good can come.

Acceptance

Sometimes, what we hope for simply isn’t possible. No amount of wishing will ensure it. Here, all we can do is bring acceptance to the situation and attempt to minimise the obvious stress and suffering of those involved. I do not feel equipped to do this yet, but I can certainly try to learn the skill of compassionate listening in the desire that it might help.

**From the heart**
Image: Photo by Meghna R on Unsplash

Equally, often what we hope for does not materialise. Life has a habit of taking us by surprise and the goals we have laboured for so long are snatched away. Hard though it is to appreciate at the time, this might be better for us. Though my life has hardly gone to plan over the last several years, I’m not sure that the outcomes have been any worse than if they had. What I have lost in health and material wealth has been more than compensated for in leisure time (to write this, for example), friendship and an opportunity for spiritual development. On balance, I believe I am better off in all the ways that count. Though I regularly have to remind myself of this when frustrated by my limitations. You really can’t have it all.

All will be well

When life seems especially bleak, the words of the medieval anchoress, Julian of Norwich, are very welcome. Sometimes I repeat them on an indefinite loop, but only today did I look up the source. I discovered that these words came from a vision she had while dangerously ill. She was questioning why God had allowed sin (all the contents of Pandora’s box) to enter the world when he was omnipotent. Here is the answer she received:

But Jesus, who in this vision informed me of all that is needed by me, answered with these words and said: ‘It was necessary that there should be sin; but all shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well.
Julian of Norwich, Revelations of Divine Love

It seems that despite life’s suffering, we need not despair for ultimately, ‘all will be well’. Is she right? I certainly hope so.

Micro-cation

Sometimes you just have to get away. It doesn’t need to be for long and it doesn’t have to be far. Sometimes what is needed is a micro-cation, a mini vacation of just a day or two that is far enough from home to have the novelty of the unfamiliar, but close enough that the journey is no problem at all.

After a very tense few weeks and the disappointment of my son being unable to travel due to health issues, we needed a break. We took it in the nearby town of Battle at a hotel we love. It enabled us to recharge our spirits and soothe our over-stretched nerves. Our son is now well on the way to recovery and plans to reschedule his trip. I’m hoping to take him to Battle when he does. It’s perfect.

**The High Street from above** Image: Tourist information

National treasures

We are so blessed in the UK with an endless supply of picturesque villages and towns. So much so that it seems almost perverse to look for interesting places abroad when there is so much on our very doorsteps. With the pandemic making travel at best difficult and at worst impossible, now is a good time to explore those treasures that are closer to home.

The town of Battle boasts not only a charming high street filled with independent shops, but a significant historic building in the form of Battle Abbey – built on the site of the somewhat mis-named Battle of Hastings. It makes an imposing focal point to the High Street and I thought of how this place had changed the course of British history forever.

**Battle Abbey under a brooding sky** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Hidden history

Since we had visited the Abbey grounds before, we decided to walk instead around the perimeter and explore the less obvious part of Battle. We were not disappointed. Tucked behind this magnificent building was a narrow street crammed with old houses replete with history; the beginning of the 1066 walk and a perfect Norman church built to serve the Benedictine Abbey opposite in 1115. Were I not coming to the end of my energies, I would have ventured inside. It boasts some wonderful interior features that I am determined to enjoy on my next visit. Exploring new places is like peeling an onion. No sooner have you discovered one layer of interest than another presents itself.

**St Mary the Virgin**
Images: Karen Costello-McFeat

Going at a walking pace (me on the scooter) we were able to really enjoy our surroundings: the quirky door knockers; the giant trees in the churchyard; the little plaques commemorating significant residents. My favourite was of the Abbot who had been moved from the Abbey to a tiny cottage after Henry VIII’s dissolution of the monastery. I wondered how he had coped with such an enormous change of fortunes.

Travelling the road was like passing through time, with the buildings nodding to every period from the medieval to modern. Steps from the ancient church was a tiny, vintage petrol station nestled discretely just off the pavement. What would the returning crusader knights, who blunted their swords on the walls of the chapel in the church, think of our shiny, motorised steeds?

Powder Mills

After a thorough reconnoitre of the town, a delicious pub lunch and a trip to the local craft shop, we were ready to head to our home for the evening. We had stayed at this hotel some years ago and were determined to return.

**One of the beautiful additions clad in Virginia creeper** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

It is a wonderful, country house hotel – a little faded at the edges, a little shabby even in parts, but rich in charm. The original building was an old gun powder mill which detonated itself numerous times (occupational hazard) until it was eventually converted into a hotel. Over the years, additions were added yet somehow always entirely in keeping with the elegant Georgian original.

Delightful as the hotel is, the real enchantment lies in the location. It is set in literally acres of woodland, lakes and fields. Wellington boots are available for guests to use to explore these, often muddy, surroundings. We followed a little trail that wound into the trees and discovered an abundance of sweet chestnuts amongst the leaf litter, which we stuffed into our pockets. The path took us past the water drop that powered the old mill and on to where the trail opened out to a magnificent lake. Set against the brilliant blue sky of late autumn and the woodland palette of ochre, rust, amber and muted greens, it made a breath taking vista.

**The lake in autumn finery** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

A change of scene

They say that a change is as good as a rest and certainly in our case it proved true. Though we were away for little more than twenty-four hours, we crammed our days with exploration, delicious meals and the pleasure of outdoors. We met dozens of friendly folks with whom we exchanged plans and pleasantries.

Though autumn may not be the most obvious season for travel, it has its own allure. With prices more affordable and places less crowded, it more than makes up for the lower temperatures. And you do not have to stay for long. A micro-cation of a day or maybe two is enough to immerse yourself somewhere relatively local but engagingly new. Our brief visit has only whet our appetite for more. I’m sure it will be magical at Christmas…

Enhance your Landscape

Nature is without doubt wonderful, but at the risk of gilding the lily, nature plus a little human artistry is even better. For me, the interplay of human adornment to natural surroundings somehow augments the beauty of each. My travels to the North and a recent purchase here in the South has prompted me to share with you ideas for decorating your landscape whether with fine art or using natural materials.

**Giant teapot Yorkshire Sculpture Park** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Sculpture Parks

There are few better venues for sculpture (especially the giant kind) than a sculpture park. I’d been longing to go to the Yorkshire one for ages, since the collection is world class. The sculptures were all modern and often rather witty. The teapot above contained leaves; its counterpart of a wine bottle, grape vines. Though one could not argue that these sculptures exactly blended with the landscape (they were far too attention grabbing for that) they did make a startling and pleasing contrast to the rolling lawns of formal parkland. Juxtaposing huge metal structures with sheep placidly grazing certainly helps focus the attention.

**An engagement ring for a giantess?**
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Closer to nature

Once in the Highlands, we were absorbed in the glorious, natural surroundings. The ancient forest surrounding where we were staying needed little to make it more perfect, but the activities of the local primary school managed to achieve even that.

**A little trail of hope** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

On the main, large trail, students had arranged painted pebbles for some distance. Some were funny and childlike; some were exquisite, but all lifted the spirits. We spoke to a local who explained that it was a project to cheer everyone up during the pandemic and encourage people to go outside. Eventually, those paints will fade away, as the elements take their toll; however, the pebbles will remain as a sweet reminder of how little steps bind and hearten our community.

**Beauty is Nature** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

In my home town, a Facebook project was launched called Secret Stones. It encouraged children to paint and hide pebbles and to look for others. Once found, they were photographed and possibly rehidden. Guessing the location of the photographed stones was part of the appeal. I love the idea of discovered ‘treasures’ and hope more of us will be inclined to participate in such undertakings. We don’t even need to do it formally: leaving a painted stone or natural object in a park or along a school route is bound to bring the discoverer some joy.

Or we can use natural materials (plus a little man-made) to draw the eye to something we might overlook. Ancient pine forest is, unsurprisingly, littered with pine cones, but this humorous little collection made me look at them anew.

**Hedgehog den** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Garden ornamentation

If a sudden windfall were to come my way, I would definitely like to invest in some fine sculpture for the garden. That being unlikely (the most I have ever won with my premium bonds being £25) I shall have to remain satisfied with something more affordable.

Luckily for me, a superb artist/sculptor called Paul Cox lives only a few miles away down the coast. We had already purchased a couple of smaller items from him when I was kindly offered a very early 60th birthday present of a sculpture from my mum. After perusing the website, I thought a visit to the studio would be wise. We arranged a time and went to see him. There is something especially lovely about buying something direct from the artist. Not only do you know they have been properly compensated, but the work has a personal stamp. The one we chose was appropriately called Lockdown Easing with the birds escaping from their cage. It has now taken up residence under the apple tree.

Something old, something new

Human beings, it seems, are never quite content with leaving their environments untouched by their creativity. Some of our earliest outdoor sculptures go back millennia. The stunning monoliths at Stonehenge and chalk carvings like the White Horse prove that we have been doing this forever. Now, artwork might take the form of ingenious graffiti drawn on an urban landscape to deliver poignant social commentary. Or, it may take the more feminine craftivist version such as yarn bombing. Whatever shape it takes, it certainly improves the view.

**Who could see this and not smile?** Image: Peter Olding on Wikipedia

My knitting skills wouldn’t extend to making a sock, but I should love to do something to add a little creative magic to my environment. Perhaps I should start with a pebble.

Homemade Halloween

**A pumpkin hobbit house! Pumpkin festival, Maine** Image: Genevieve Spears

Without doubt, Halloween is my favourite festival. You get the opportunity to festoon the house with crazy decorations; dress up and enjoy an abundance of goodies. Even better, unlike other major holidays, it doesn’t require elaborate meals or gift buying. For me, it is the ideal combination of quirky fun with no stress.

The only problem is in trying to avoid making my carbon footprint any bigger. So, the challenge I set myself was to make my Halloween plastic free and ideally only use resources that I already had. What I was delighted to discover was that not only was this possible, but added to the enjoyment of my preparations.

What follows are some ideas that you might like to adapt for your Halloween celebrations.

Decorations

No-one knows how to decorate better than the Americans and Halloween decorations are often on a cinematic scale. The pumpkin carved hobbit house above is just one example of the artistic ingenuity and playfulness that so perfectly fits this festival. Such things are well beyond my capabilities, but I can still have fun with paper and scissors.

Quoth the Raven, ‘Nevermore’
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Silhouettes of spiders, ravens and bats make great decorations. I copied the above free-hand from an image I found on the Internet, but you could just as easily print one off and cut it out.

Paper cutting

Inspired by a new paper cutting book, I also attempted some fun little spider webs on a variety of papers. I attached these to the window with blue tack and then added a few black spiders. The little bat garland was cut out of crepe paper – using the same method as for making little paper chain people. Just remember to always leave a fold for joining.

**Decorations to be enjoyed inside and out!**
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

I used a different form of paper cut for a card for my husband. This method is called kirigami – a sort of origami with scissors. The outline was pre-printed on the paper, so I can take no credit for it, but it would not be difficult to make your own. Simply fold your paper in half, sketch your design leaving a clear fold mark that you don’t cut. Attach this to a piece of folded card in a strong contrast colour (making sure not to glue your design) and then gently lift the design away and fold so that it is pressed against the card sides when flat and ‘pops up’ when opened.

**I knew that orange envelope would come in handy eventually**. Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Origami gift boxes

I’m not sure how many little trick-or-treaters we will have this year, but I am sure that I want them to be safe. Normally, I would fill a Halloween bag and let them dig in, but with Covid concerns, I thought I needed something more individual. So I hit upon the idea of filling little containers with sweets and passing them out. It would also make their gifts a little more special.

My first idea was to make witches’ hats cones and then I decided upon origami boxes in Halloween colours, though either would work perfectly. I’ve added little handles to finish them off. If you’d like to know how to make them, I’ve included a link here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdKUkslqwHo Or if you fancy the witches hats, here’s a fun tutorial: https://www.u-createcrafts.com/witch-hat-party-cone-tutorial-free/

**Halloween gift boxes**
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Now all I have to do is fill and pass them out. Unfortunately, for hygiene reasons, I will have to give wrapped sweets, but as that is all the waste I shall be creating, I don’t feel too bad.

That done, I can look forward to making pumpkin soup and other Halloween goodies and then start setting my mind to the next big festival. Post Halloween, talking of Christmas is now allowed.

The Consolations of Nature

Whenever the cares of life seem to be pressing the very air from my lungs, I go outside and breathe. No matter how stressed or frustrated or flustered I am, a dip into the natural world always makes me feel at least a bit better. Often, I take a little turn around the garden and look for new arrivals (whilst averting my eyes from the weeds), or I take Hermione out to play. At the weekends, I’ll venture further to the coast or the Downs. Whatever the landscape, Nature provides a healing balm to life’s scratches.

**Late autumn flowers always lift the spirits**
Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Gifts

Nature doesn’t wait for any festival to bestow her gifts. She is generous in providing to anyone who takes a moment simply to appreciate her. This last week I have enjoyed all the usual joys of late autumn blooms, but there have been some more unusual sightings too: of a peacock butterfly that rested a few yards from where I was sitting; a rainbow arching into the sea by Beachy Head and a flock of starlings feeding on the tiny berries of my cabbage tree (palm).

**Starling bird food!** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Whatever the weather

The blue skies above are a rare treat, but then, the benefits of Nature are available in all conditions. After a day of being enclosed in the house, there is no better tonic than a sea breeze to blow the blues away.

These last weeks, we seem to alternate from late summer, to high winds, to torrential rain in a matter of hours. As a friend said, ‘English weather always gives you something to talk about.’ Yet, all of these weather conditions have their charm. While sitting in the shed and supervising Hermione, the heavens opened and she ran in to join me for shelter. The rain battered the glass and the wind threatened to lift the shed off its foundations (Wizard of Oz style), but I would not have wished to be anywhere else. There are few things more comforting than being in the dry looking out at the rain and our proximity made our shelter all the more precious. Experiencing extreme weather is also a necessary reminder of all that we have to be grateful for. I never see a day like this and not think of those less fortunate who have nowhere to shelter in a storm.

**Stormy weather is nothing if not dramatic** Image: Marek Piwnicki on Unsplash

Investing in clothing that protects us from the elements is always a good idea. The Scandinavians know this and maintain their outdoor pursuits throughout the most adverse conditions. We once visited Copenhagen in mid February. It was so cold that even breathing was painful, yet, the streets were filled with cyclists and we passed several joggers on our walk around the city. They are wise these Danes. In addition to the usual benefits of exercise, doing it in the colder weather also enhances your mood and boosts your immune system – vital with the prevalence of germs and viruses from autumn onwards.

Unfortunately, long walks and normal exercise are no longer an option for me, but I can always make it to a bench or employ my scooter to take me further into the natural world. Even enjoying the garden from the window has its benefits and always fills me with joy. I love to watch the sun set in the evenings and the subtle shifts in colour as dusk ushers in the night. When I take Hermione out for her final toilet trip, I look up to see the moon and stars. If it is clear enough, I am rewarded with the most glorious skyscapes. Though brooding clouds with the moon peeping through thrill me also.

**Moon and cloud. My favourite combination** Image: Aron Visuals on Unsplash

With the recent harvest moon, my husband drove me down to the beach to see it round and fat and setting the sea alight with silver. Other days, I have watched it wax and wane, sometimes proudly holding its place in the sky and at others struggling to peek through the clouds.

And when you are unable to go outside, it’s good to know that even looking at pictures of nature will have a soothing effect. A Dutch study in 2015 found that contemplating natural images reduced stress. So if you find yourself in a windowless office, photos or posters of natural scenes will give you the boost you need.

Back to Nature

With our sophisticated lives and temperature controlled homes and buildings, it is easy to forget that we are the products of Nature. Our lives may be far from those of our ancestors, but we still need to reconnect with the earth from which we came and which sustains us. I love the image of Mother Earth. It is so warm and comforting to think of her this way. And good mother that she is, when we need her, she is always there and ready to soothe our souls.

Coping with Catastrophe

Currently, one might be forgiven for believing, like Chicken Licken, that the sky is falling in. Throughout the last eighteen months, we seem to have lurched from one disaster to another: a world-wide pandemic; food and fuel shortages and natural disasters. My book club choice for this month is rather apt. Weather, by Jenny Offill, deals with the threat of climate change with humour and compassion, and it has got me thinking about how best we can deal with the comedy of errors we call life.

**Predicting stormy weather** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Nothing new under the sun

What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done, there is nothing new under the sun.
Ecclesiastes, I.9 New revised Standard Version Bible

These words of wisdom were written millennia ago – around the mid 10th century, BC. And, of course, if we think about it, everything we are going through now is simply an echo of a previous time. The Spanish ‘flu of the early 20th century was far more devastating than our own pandemic and even that was a great improvement on the Plague.

As someone born in the 1960s, I have been privileged to live through the most affluent and stable time in history, yet my childhood was shadowed by labour unrest and three day weeks, hyperinflation, IRA bombings and war abroad. There was even a toilet roll shortage in the 1970s fuelled largely by panic buying (sound familiar?)

My parents, grandparents and great-grandparents had to deal with much greater calamities, yet the moral is: here we are. We are stronger than we think.

**The sun has seen it all** Image: Federico Respini on Unsplash

Be prepared

In the US, those who are preparing for future disaster are called preppers. They store vast quantities of guns, food and fuel and usually locate themselves ‘far from the madding crowd.’ Perhaps, should a Zombie apocalypse or nuclear war occur, they will survive. (Though why anyone would wish to live in such circumstances is beyond me.) Tempting though it may be to try to shore up against all possible catastrophe, it simply isn’t practical. (My larder really isn’t that big).

Better still, we would be wise to prepare ourselves mentally and physically to cope with whatever may befall us. The Scouts have the right idea in fostering skills that encourage using what little there is to hand and to manage even when conditions are less than optimal. Camping in the rain, chopping wood and hiking difficult trails shows us that we can overcome adversity and that is crucial when faced with life’s challenges.

**The rather vital ability to find one’s way**: Image Mael Balland on Unsplash

Resilience and flexibility

Resilience and flexibility are two qualities we would be wise to nurture to ensure that life’s ‘slings and arrows’ do not hurt us. Modern living, with its focus on instant gratification and personalised service, has weakened our abilities to adapt and recover from difficulties. Sometimes we simply have to do without. Since for most of us fortunate enough to live in the West, this means doing without luxuries: foreign travel, the brand of product we love or the ability to drive anywhere we want. Ask someone in the developing world what doing without means and they will probably point to necessities like food. Keeping a sense of perspective is important.

But to show that I am as fallible as anyone, I had a grumpy moment today while looking for some rice cakes or crackers to go with my soup for lunch. We were out of all of the above. I stood in my pantry and bewailed my loss. ‘I have nothing to eat!’ I cried out in my head while my eyes scanned the abundance of tins and dry goods on the shelves and the large fridge-freezer in front of me. A little voice in my head said, ‘Really?’ Then I laughed. Of course, I had plenty. Sometimes, we just have to remind ourselves.

And contrary to popular belief, a little hardship is not a bad thing. Without challenge, we are diminished. As anyone who has gone to the gym will know, you have to push yourself to exhaustion and even pain for muscle to build. Growth, both physical and mental, requires training and discipline. It is seldom comfortable. Indeed, we should be wary of comfort. Contrary to what advertisers might tell you, it creates far more unhappiness than joy. Only when we negotiate difficulties and overcome them, will we be rewarded with that.

Positive thinking

**Happiness is a state of mind** Image: Ahmed Zayan on Unsplash

Getting our heads into a good place is going to be the most beneficial ‘prepping’ that we can do. We can take practical steps like reducing our dependence on social media (which rather like Chicken Licken loves followers in their proclamations of doom). We can temper our use of mainstream media, since it sells on the basis of what outrages rather than informs. We can turn our minds and actions to helping others, since ironically, it help us too.

Of course, we can train our minds through meditation, prayer and mindfulness to become more accepting and more alert. Focussing on what is rather than catastrophising about what might be would serve us all well. When I think of all my sources of stress, they are almost invariably of the what might be category. Yet, it was not the sky that fell but an acorn.

And most of all, be grateful. I once had a wee poster that said ‘Every day may not be good, but there is good in every day.’ Cultivating gratitude is the ultimate weapon against despair. Recently, I came across this lovely quote by Elizabeth Gaskell writing in the mid 19th century:

Looking back upon the year’s accumulated heap of troubles, Margaret wondered how they had been borne. If she could have anticipated them, how she would have shrunk away and hid herself from the coming time! And yet day by day had, of itself, and by itself, been very endurable – small, keen, bright little spots of positive enjoyment having come sparkling into the very middle of sorrows.
Elizabeth Gaskell, North and South

And now I better go and take the dog to the puppy park. She has dropped her ball at my feet and is pawing me for attention. It will probably rain. But that’s okay, I have a good jacket.

Portals to Another World

Teleportation doesn’t just occur in the sci-fi, fantasy world of Star Trek, it exists right here, right now. In order to be transported into another realm, we need only open a book. As we enter into the imaginative world of those pages, we can experience lives ancient and modern; observe and enter into the minds of others. And perhaps most excitingly, experience any number of lives:

A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies … The man who never reads lives only one.
George R R Martin, A Dance with Dragons

Beam me up, Scotty!

That isn’t even an option on the Enterprise.

Books have been on my mind, of late, in part because I have been chatting with bookish friends; exchanging titles we have enjoyed and making a long awaited visit to my local book shop.

Why read?

One of the first questions I ask my English students is: why read? They often look at me a bit blankly then try to think what the correct answer might be. Some come up with things like improving spelling or garnering more information about the world, but few get much further than that. So I shall attempt to answer that question here and I hope add a few more ideas to your arsenal when others ask the same question of you.

The study of English at the university level is rather more recent than you might think. It began in Scotland and the US in the early 18th century and not until the mid 19th century in England. And it was not a common university major until the latter part of the twentieth century. Up until the 19th century, one’s literary education revolved largely around reading the classics and religious texts. The seismic shifts in science, religious belief and the social upheavals of the 19th century led to literature being a source of moral guidance and cultural focus. In a world of ethical uncertainty, books offered an anchor of sorts. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English_studies)

Reading makes you good

Reading novels in the 18th and 19th century was generally viewed as at best, a waste of time and at worst, morally ruinous. (Women might, after all, be tempted to run off with the wrong man or neglect her household duties!) As time went on, though, arguments were made to suggest that reading – especially more worthy literature -actually improved morals. The jury is still out on whether this is true. Odious individuals have been great readers; however, there is plenty evidence to support the idea the reading increases the quality of empathy. In a book, we can walk not only a mile but for hours, ‘in a man’s shoes’. Understanding another’s perspective and experiences is almost impossible with our brief encounters with one another in real life; however, it is feasible in a novel. I’m currently reading an excellent one called The Wolf Den by Elodie Harper. It concerns the lives of prostitutes in a brothel in Pompeii – not something I am going to come across, but while I read about these slave girls and their lives in the ancient world, I am also conscious of the parallels of modern slavery and especially sex trafficking. I’m trusting that my novel will have a more satisfying outcome that could be expected in our modern world.

**On my book table** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

Readers are good for business

While researching all things bookish, I came across an interesting article by the Harvard Business Review that noted some of the benefits of a workforce of readers. It certainly supported the argument for empathy, stating: ‘reading literary fiction helps people develop e mpathy, theory of mind, and critical thinking.’ Further, it promotes emotional intelligence – a vital component of any team based activity. The article continues, ‘ When we read, we hone and strengthen several different cognitive muscles, so to speak, that are the root of the EQ. In other words, the act of reading is the very activity—if done right—that can develop the qualities, traits, and characteristics of those employees that organizations hope to attract and retain.’ Readers are a premium in the job market.

Further, readers are good at suspending judgement and willing to consider alternative views. In a world where unconsidered thinking is all too prevalent, this is a boon both for the flexible thinking required in the work and for democracy itself.

Reading reassures

When we read of a character’s challenges and their overcoming of adversity, we are able to reflect on the difficulties that our own lives contain and hopefully, see them more clearly and positively. Bibliotherapy works in just this way, showing at the very least that we are not alone in our suffering and often promising that the future may well be brighter than we think.

Children’s stories, and especially fairy tales, help the child build resilience and courage to face not just the monsters under the bed but the very real challenges of growing up.

If nothing else, a good book transports us into a different realms where, for the time of reading at least, our everyday concerns can be forgotten for a while.

**Solace in reading** Image: Karen Costello-McFeat

That’s entertainment!

The one thing that disappoints me most when asking students the ‘Why read?’ question is that no-one has ever said, because it is fun. Perhaps we can blame the rather more obvious appeal of social media or children being force-fed long, out of date and difficult novels. Perhaps reading is just for oldies like me, but when I think of the excitement and enthusiasm shown for books such as the Harry Potter series, I wonder too if we are just not giving kids what they want or the time and leisure to idle away an afternoon immersed in a story.

Buy the book

I’m as guilty as the next person for borrowing, sharing and buying used books, but I do think we need to support authors by buying them new when we can. I’ve even started indulging in getting hardbacks. They may cost a little more, but the larger print, gorgeous sturdy binding and satisfying heft make it worth it.

We also need to support independent book shops. Here we may ask advice, browse real texts and get recommendations. My local book shop, Much Ado Books, is so good and the owners know us and our reading habits so well that when we go, we simply ask them to choose a selection for us. It’s like having one’s own personal shopper. Perhaps it helps too that it is a magical place to be.

Book groups

Many of you reading this are members of reading circles. The one I started with a friend when my youngest was a babe in arms, is still going strong 28 years on. Sometimes the attraction is more for the wine and socialising, but it does give a good excuse to read at least one book a month and to try authors that are new. It is impossible to enjoy every choice, but I have never failed to gain something from our selections and I have certainly been introduced to some treasures. If you are looking for a group to join, an ideal place to start is the local library. They are sure to point you in the right direction and probably have a group of their own. Or, find a few friends to join you and work out the most suitable way for you to run it. Don’t be afraid to experiment. I have been to book groups who have regular speakers; know some where they have dinner alongside and others that meet in the pub. In the past, we have met in each others’ homes, but this month, we are trialling meeting at a local hotel for afternoon tea. Book groups needn’t be dull and worthy.

The best part about books is sharing your thoughts and recommendations. So if you have a ‘must read’, please put it in the comments box below. Who knows where they will take us.